A change

[Lovely]

March 21, year 2
morning


Gully had had... and certainly heard... enough from the young ones on either side of his room at the house, those who were wed and wild on one side, and the other two, young and bold and yet to be married, if it were ever to come to pass, all driving his head further beneath his pillows in search of peace as he reminded himself not to judge unfairly nor cast stones. There was only so far he could dig beneath his covers for quiet before realizing the inevetible which found him tipped, asleep, on a pew in his small church, having found rest at last, though stiff and flat and a little cold where he wrapped his coats around himself at some point in the late night.

Andrea had come early in the morning after things had wound down at Tessa's.. as she did a few times a week, she cleaned herself up and put on her most modest dress, which wasn't exactly proper in the eyes of those who saw themselves as better than she. She made her way to the little church to clean and keep it nice as she had for awhile now, since the Carlisle family had showed her and her 'sisters' at Tessa's such kindness and protection. The young blonde had also become quite smitten with Gully, though a girl of her place in the world had no right to feel such a way about a man fine and decent as he was. A smile curled her lip and she hummed very softly as she moved along, cleaning and oiling the wood pews, the wood would always glow in it's dark beauty when she was done. Of course the girl was exhausting herself, long nights at Tessa's making as much money as she could, which she used to buy things for the church or for Gully, which she would leave for him without saying a word or telling him where they had come from. A new shirt now and then, an offering each week in the basket.. her hand paused as she came across a shoe.. not just a shoe, but a foot and leg.. and oh dear it was Gully! He was asleep and she watched his face quietly, he looked peaceful and she was entranced by his handsome content face for a few moments. Andrea didn't consciously think about it as she leaned to kiss him softly, her eyes closing as her lips brushed against his.

Perhaps it was a dream he was in at the moment affecting him, but he found he couldn't move. A word on his lips was taken softly, warmly it seemed and his eyes fluttered as the vision faded away to the pale morning light. He pursed the tingling sensation between his lips and tried to speak as the room came into view along with the angelic face of one of his loyal congregation. Names and sense escaped him at the moment, but he smiled softly in the recognition from his deeper slumber, making the words form, but no sound come out. "Good morning..."

She felt his lips move against hers and she reached to a deeper kiss, though still very tender and then she gently pulled away. "Did you sleep here all night?" She asked him softly, brushing her knuckle over his cheek.

Was he still dreaming or had death taken him during his slumber. It wasn't his imagination that he'd been kissed and he watched her, confused, as she pulled away, more into focus as she did so and he could see the girl more clearly. Her hair was plainly done and her clothing clean and proper, unlike... The fog cleared a little more. "Miss Andrea? I...," he looked at where he was laid out and did a quick inventory to ensure he was also appropriately covered, as at the house, he tended not to be. His elbow pounded roughly and unexpectedly against the back of the pew and his lurch nearly caused him to roll completely to the floor in a startled flounder. He grasped the back of the pew to hold himself, half prone and half falling, righting himself slowly to sitting then nursing his elbow. "Apparently, I did," he grinned, a bit embarrassed.

She smiled a little as he woke up and she reached to try and help steady him. "Is your elbow alright? Are you cold? It's chilly this morning." Her hands brushed over his arms and she gazed upon him with affection and concern.

[Lovely]

He looked from one hand to the other, wondering if he'd been in a fight he'd forgotten about and dabbed his lip that still tingled strangely. No blood.. probably no fight... then why...? "Fine... fine morning. It was too hot at the house anyway... I think," he said, trying to remember getting here. Was he that tired? He looked up at her again. "Thank you, I'm fine," he smiled warmly, speaking hushed enough that his voice didn't carry like it would during sermons.

Andrea nodded and let her hands drop away, but remained close to him. "You ought to have someone to take care of you.. You shouldn't be sleeping here.." She murmured softly.

"And why's that?" He said, still smiling a little, forgetting his elbow now.

"Because.. you do so much for others, someone should be doing for you as well.. Someone to make you smile and come looking for you when you don't come home at night." Her lip curled a bit more in response to his slight smile. "..and this bench is hard.." She shook her head, a light blush heating her cheeks as she did not voice her other thoughts.

He chuckled. "In our house? There are times I think they're thankful when there aren't so many there at once. And I am looked after," he pointed up gently, but didn't press that issue. He more watched her expression and found it curious. "And the benches have been well looked after, too, thank you. You're here early today."

Andrea nodded. "Of course he does.. I didn't mean.." She glanced up and then shook her head, her long blonde locks brushing over her shoulders. "I was meaning down here.. " She blushed a little more and her eyes set to the wood she'd polished with loving care. "I'm not early.. I always come at this time.. " Her face turned towards him and though she smiled genuinely and her face was pretty as ever, she looked tired, up all night working and then as soon as she could get away from such work, with the early light of morning she'd come here to set to taking care of something she'd come to love.

"It appears that only one of us has slept, though" he noted, seeing that she appeared tired behind the smile. "Your chores do not go unappreciated, but you do need rest."

"I'll rest later." She looked away to the floor, feeling lesser and ashamed of why she hadn't slept. It was her life and all she'd really known, before she'd known this place and Gully's voice she'd not felt such shame for the life she had to live. She'd been fine with her lot in life, before she'd known there was anything better.

"Most of us will," he said, almost a bit darkly. "Even you. You might think I hadn't noticed... but I do," he smiled a bit brighter now.

She looked back at him curiosly. "I don't think I understand what you mean."

"You... coming here. Not many of the girls do, but you do. You have for some time. I'm curious. Why? You come and you listen, but yet you go back... well, to the house."

Her smile was sad and she gave a slight shrug. "Where else would I go? I have nowhere else to go."

[Lovely]

He frowned the thought as he mulled. "Well, there's likely honest work at the inn, or even the station, if you know numbers. If it were my place to say, that whole house would be torn down, but I see your point a bit." He paused in his thought a moment, sickened that her keep was earned in such a way, wondering if he had the means to help her. With Ciara on the mend at their home, there was likely work at the mercantile, but with him making the offer, there was likely no way old Ephraim would agree to take on a new hand. He thought another long moment before turning to her. "Do you like the work you do here? Polishing and setting the candles and shining the windows?"

Andrea nodded, her eyes lifting from the floor to his face, her own face sincere as she answered. "I do.. I like this place and taking care of it." Her voice was hushed but clearly understandable.

"It might be hard for you, since you're known in this town, but would you be able to give up your lacey frocks for simple and plain... and proper clothing? Can you write?"

Her expression was hard to read as her head tilted to regard him, a bit of confusion settling around her eyes. "I.. I don't have proper clothes, not what most folks think is proper.. I have this and the dress Tessa gave me for wearing on Sundays, it was one of hers.. " She bit her lip and her eyes fell to the floor, she nodded. "I can read and write.. I went to school.." She trailed off with a shrug of her shoulders. "But I don't understand what any of this has to do with me being at Tessa's?"

"Everything to do with you not returning there. Now, I know you have friends and in some way they have been your family, but," he shook his head. "You show by being here that you want better. I can only help you if you are willing to start new. There's a small room here, though I'm not sure why I didn't go there last night, but perhaps there's a reason." He looked up a moment then back to her. "There wouldn't be much money to offer, but I do need more hands here. The room is small and drafty, but that can be fixed. The churchyard is nearly the only spot of green in town and needs water from the well every morning. I've been content to take care of that on my own, but with more hands..."

She trembled slightly, sinking down to sit on the floor, her eyes welled with tears at his kind offer. But she was certain it would cause nothing but trouble for him, how could she be such a burden on him? "I couldn't.. take money from you.." She shook her head. "I do this.." Her hands gestured about to indicate the chores she came to take care of. "Because it makes me feel good inside.. like there is some small part of me that is worth more. Because I care about this place.. and certain people.." Her fingers lifted to wipe the tears from her cheek.

"Then room and board and the allowance for a new dress twice a year. I'd insist on nothing less," he said, pulling his clean kerchief from his pocket for her tears. "There is more than a small part that is worth... a great deal. It would warm my heart to see you turn from that life and do good here."

She took the hankerchief in her fingers and played with the slip of cloth. "What about.. the people in town. I don't think they will take kindly to my changing.." She glanced up at him, with a bit of fear in her eyes, her usual spunk and fire clouded by it.

[Lovely]

"Just be kind to them in return... not.. in your usual manner," he started off, then changed directions in the thought. "Be kind and prove them wrong. The strength in your heart will change the minds that are meant to change."

"Be kind to them.." She lifted her eyes upward and sighed. "I'll try to remember to do that when.." She trailed off leaving the rest of the statement to the air. He didn't understand how harshly she was already treated by certain people in town.. for daring to do what she already did, by coming on Sundays and the other days that she spent cleaning here. Especially a few men who tended to be rougher with her, as if to bring her down further and convince her she was dirt, that she had no business trying to make herself better. Andrea's gaze came back to Gully and the tears slipped silently down her cheeks. "Do I have to be kind to them.. if they aren't kind to you?"

"If they aren't kind to you... here... then they'll need to answer to me. This is a different house... and they should know better. I could make some fancy quotes and turn a few pages, but the truth is, people will do what they do, but -good- people forgive and do what's right, okay? I think you're good people looking for something better. This is a start... and the room is yours if you're willing. And there's nothing stopping you from coming and going. The door out there is never locked, but the room itself does have a key.... and a leak that I will need tended to right away."

She looked a bit terrified but nodded slowly. "I do want something better.. do I have to live in exile to be a better person?"

"Exile? No, no of course you don't. It's a place to call your own is what I meant. Dear heavens, no. I thought you'd like a room that was refuge and peace compared to what you're used to. You'd hardly be alone, though, if that's what you meant. I'm here a good deal of the time and there's the children's choir and the sermons.. and it's nearly summer. The cavalrymen will be coming through before too long needing food and mending and ... a lot of work to do, but hardly cut off from the world. You'd be in the center of activity actually."

She stared at him shocked, scared.. she felt like she couldn't breathe. "Have you lost your senses?" Her voice when she finally spoke was very soft. "No one in this town will want me near their children.. " She swallowed back at the fear that rose up at the thought of all those men and what she was.. what they would expect of her. "I meant exile.. as in.. if I leave Tessa's.. I'm alone. I have no one else.. You may believe the people in this town are good.. and I am sure some are, but even those who tolerate me or find enough courage to be decent to me.. will never forget what I am now and I will never be accepted.. That is what I meant about having to be in exile in order to be better. To give up what I have now.. I will be alone for the rest of my life. I wondered why it has to be that way?"

"People here think that of my brother, and yet he has two of his own. And Tessa and her girls won't stop looking after you just because you're under a different roof. I'll get to look after you a little more, if that's a comfort. But you're right, it shouldn't be that way. So we make sure it isn't," he shrugged lightly. It seemed simple to him, but, even in his brothers, he saw the good in people.

"Your brother is married and his wife lets him near their children.." She laughed softly despite the growing fear and flip flops of her stomach. "That is respectable.. " She sighed and handed him back his hankerchief. "How do we make sure it isn't like that? How do you make people forget what I've done?"

"My brother... is also the only man ever to be barred from returning to Tessa's - before he was even 21! I can't even begin to tell you about Alex, but even his history is fading in a short time... although not likely with Old Palmer any time soon. Time... and faith, that's all. I have faith in you, if that helps." He took the kerchief and tucked it back in his pocket.